The Billet Article - Henriques Scribbles

This article is taken from The Billet Issue - 389 - Apr 2004, Authored by Alan Goodall

Henriques Scribbles

You know, possibly, that Keith has arranged for me to come up and have a chat to you about entertaining children. Well hopefully you do or you wouldn't be here tonight. Then again perhaps you didn't know and that is why you are here. The first surprise was the date. Admitted I have a note in my diary that I would be up north, but I thought I was going to Blackpool, a small market town, to their pleasure beach.

I was grateful that he had booked me for April 2nd, as booking me for the day before, April 1st, would have given many magicians who came along the opportunity to say, "Henrique and his lecture, yer gotta be joking. "From what I can gather, no members will be paying £6 to come in on the night, but may be paying £6 to get out.

A close friend of mine, well he was until he found out that I was quite prepared to let him pay for the lunch and drinks, was always calling me famous. Afterwards he was calling me something like, 'Tight faced old git!' Of course if you do write regularly you do become well known, may be in name only, and this awful realisation hit me with a right old thud when I touched down in Perth, Western Australia. They had booked me on my reputation not as a childrens entertainer, but something they had conjured up in their minds having read some of my stuff. The first thing that arose was fear. The second being that it was a long swim back to Blighty. Luckily most of those that attended were either clowns, many strangely enough from Singapore, and other childrens entertainers.

Well, let's get this perfectly clear. I am, first second and lastly, a childrens entertainer. I have had successes (see my 1938 diary, August 12") and failures (see other diaries up to the present day). Whilst I have always been prepared to admit that I have made mistakes, I cannot ever remember admitting to being an expert. What I am prepared to admit is that I must have been doing something right, as I worked full time for more years than I can remember without advertising calling myself "The Great Whatsit".

If I can be permitted to boast, and I am not day dreaming, many a time a mother ringing up to book me would change the day of her child's birthday party simply to get lovable (???) Uncle Alan. Failing that, if it was a weekend, and frankly any childrens entertainer that does not have weekend bookings should be ashamed of themselves, I could sell them my lunch time childrens shows. I would explain that I would come along about eleven thirty and do my show; then the children could have their party lunch. After lunch I would give the children thirty minutes of party games. NONE STRESSFUL TO ME. And that left all the afternoon free for the birthday child to play with their new toys, and more importantly, dad free to watch the football.

Is it, was it, could it, be that I was a brilliant childrens entertainer? No, not a bit of it, and I am not being modest. The reason was simply that I did certain things that no one will find in any magicians handbook. And if any real top line childrens entertainer should be asked, "What did Henrique do?" his honest answer would be, "I haven't a clue".

That, dear readers, is the truth. My real proud boast being that you could come into my show halfway through and not have missed a thing.......... I rest my case.

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